Sunday, January 6, 2013

Poetry by Fighters!

I have wondered when I write why I think of things to say that would never come out in daily conversation. Why some words and phrases are only used when writing deepest thoughts in this form of creative expression called poetry  Will people think you odd, weird, emotional, out of touch? Maybe. If you put it in a poem are you now a creative genius? Maybe. Sometimes pain and suffering can bring wonderful things out of our souls just as happiness can. Sounds crazy but I believe its true. That.s why we have books, music, movies and poetry all born of pain, loss, despair, struggle and suffering. I asked members of my Fibromyalgia/CFS Fighters  Facebook page for poetry submissions  I only  received a few but they are great ones, pulled a couple off a fibro site and gave them their credit and although I am late in posting because I had so much on my plate, here they are. Thank you for sharing you guys!

Terri Been
Hi....My Name is Fibromyalgia, and I’m an Invisible Chronic Illness.
I am now velcroed to you for life. Others around you can’t see me or hear me, but YOUR body feels me. I can attack you anywhere and anyhow I please. I can cause severe pain or, if I’m in a good mood, I can just cause you to ache all over.  
Remember when you and Energy ran around together and had fun? I took Energy from you, and gave you Exhaustion. Try to have fun now! I also took Good Sleep from you and, in its place, gave you Brain Fog. I can make you tremble internally or make you feel cold or hot when everyone else
feels normal. Oh, yeah, I can make you feel anxious or depressed, too. If you have something planned, or are looking forward to a great day, I can take that away, too. You didn’t ask for me. I chose you for various reasons:
That virus you had that you never recovered from, or that car accident, or maybe it was the years of abuse and trauma. Well, anyway, I’m here to stay!
I hear you‘re going to see a doctor who can get rid of me. I’m rolling on the floor, laughing. Just try. You will have to go to many, many doctors until you find one who can help you effectively. You will be put on pain pills, sleeping pills, energy pills, told you are suffering from anxiety or depression, given a TENs unit, get massaged, told if you just sleep and exercise properly I will go away, told to think positively, poked, prodded, and MOST OF ALL, not
taken as seriously as you feel when you cry to the doctor how debilitating life is every day.  
Your family, friends and coworkers will all listen to you until they just get tired of hearing about how I make you feel, and that I’m a debilitating disease. Some of they will say things like “Oh, you are just having a bad day” or
“Well, remember, you can’t do the things you use to do 20 YEARS ago“, not hearing that you said 20 DAYS ago. Some will just start talking behind your back, while you slowly feel that you are losing your dignity trying to make them
understand, especially when you are in the middle of a conversation with a “Normal” person, and can’t remember what you were going to say next!
In closing, (I was hoping that I kept this part a secret), but I guess you already found out...the ONLY place you will get any support and understanding in dealing
with me is with Other People With Fibromyalgia.

"It's going to be okay" ~ Anonymous

Dream your dreams beyond another unknown tomorrow. It’ll be okay…. Dream what we all believe to be awaiting us as we go yet another step farther. It’s okay…. We can then wait for our destinies to lead us into something that has to be so much larger. It‘ll be okay…. We will then find light and existence waiting for all of our spirits, if we can just co exist with those all around us. It’ll be okay….

For we know not of the dreams that are still yet to be recognized and then in our time re-discovered. It’ll be okay…. Deep within our hearts that have become over the years so empty and intellectually shallow. It’ll be okay…. Then finally finding ourselves living by life‘s endless rules that seem to eventually always have to be followed. It’s still okay….

While living within the memories being performed by the life you take for granted. It’ll be okay…. Living as though we are all guaranteed to be alive through out the end of each and every day. It’s still okay…. It will only allow you more time for those dreams to finally have their own way. It’ll be okay…. So as you close your eyes tonight, just know that you need not be afraid. It’ll be okay…. 

Tonight is just the ending to a once lived moment we like to call today. It‘s okay…. So leave behind all of your unnecessary pain and just do your best to try and refrain. It’ll be okay…. These new feelings of ease are yours to keep if you choose to let go of all of your sorrow. It’s going to be okay…. Which means you won‘t have to steal them anymore, they are now yours to permanently borrow. It’s still okay…. 

Say out loud what you feel as though you must say. It’s okay…. The sun won’t forget your eyes tonight as you slowly drift away. It’ll be okay…. Tomorrow you will once again look back upon this illusion we now call today. It’s going to be okay…. So let it remain as just another image within a meaningful reflection of a once lived yesterday. It’ll be okay….
What more do I have to say, it‘s time to once again pick up that ball and re-learn how to play. It’ll be okay…. Don’t let life’s mysteries and miseries stand in your way. It‘ll be okay…. Just roll up your sleeves and don’t let anything get in your way. It‘s going to be okay…. Just smile and always look away. I told you it would be okay….

Darkness to Light
Falling down, too weak to fight
Feeling blind, can't see the light
Always walking in dark shadow
Never seeing the sun's warm glow
Life has long passed me by
Too overcome to even cry
Never living my dreams
Only creating silent screams
Someday maybe life I will live
All past hurts be able to forgive
Forget about all the past strife
Able to get on with my life
Once more the sun will shine
Walking in that light, so divine
A glory to behold
The wonder that is me extolled
Tammi Harrison

I Wear A Purple Ribbon

A silent killer with no face.
A thief within the night.
A constant battle for my life
A bitter evil fight.

The scars remind me of the day
It knocked at my souls door.
It tried to rob me of my strength
It left me on the floor.

To survive, I had to sacrifice
My legs and even my back
It showed no pity as it snatched
These things without a care.

I started to give up my fight
I felt I could take no more
Then God reached down and
Gently picked me up off the floor.

He wiped my face and blew my nose
Just like my mama use to do.
He said don’t cry my child
For I have things in store for you.

I did not bring you all this way
to leave you high and dry.
I love you and you are my child
So hold your head up high.

There is nothing that I cannot fix,
No pain I can’t erase.
Have faith and know that I am here
There is nothing you can’t face!

So then I threw my hands up high
And gave God all his praise!
For my soul has been uplifted
And my SPIRIT has been raised!

I’ll fight this fight with
And I know I will be fine.
For God said it and I know its true,
That VICTORY is mine!!

You torment me from deep withinAll the way to the outside of my skin
You scrape my bones and pull my hair
I cannot see you but know you are there.
You keep me awake at night
And make my muscles painfully tight
It’s you that I fight

Fibromyalgia this painful disease
Someone find a cure please

You make my fingers cramp in pain
Oh yes you are the one to blame
My minds a blur I can’t even speak
You are the one who makes me so weak
I try to walk, to stand, to play
Only to have to sit or to lay.
I’ve suffered in silence for to long this time
I don’t care who hears me whine

Fibromyalgia is ruining my life
Good thing I have the will to fight

You cause me unimaginable pain and tears
How can I go on like this for many more years
I take my pills but they don’t work anymore
My whole body is screaming and is still so sore
I lose things, I forget, I cannot understand
Sometimes I feel my mind is in another land.
Please have patience with me
I suffer with an invisible disease.
I may look okay
But today is not a good day
This morning I couldn’t walk,
Tonight I won’t be able to talk.
I get up each day
And fight and struggle to find my way
I try so hard
But feel as though my body is under bars

Fibromyalgia is making me feel this way
Someday there will be a cure and I won’t have to live this way for one more day

Sweet Darkness
Life's tuff deal with it
That's what I hear from you every day
Well I'm sick of dealing with this shit
Just take the pain away
Can't deal with this anymore
Tired of living with it
What else could be in store?
Gonna give up say Fuck it and quit
Why should I bother to care
Why punish myself by going on?
Everything's nothing but despair
Oh God I don't want to see another dawn
Not if life has to be like this
Just let me fall into a forever sleep
Let me fall into the dark abyss
Held forever in it's sweet keep
Tammi Harrison

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