Saturday, December 17, 2016

When you procrastinate...for a year!

Well we all know procrastination and lack of energy go hand in hand. Lack of energy and fibromyalgia also go hand in hand. So it should come as no surprise that I have put off even looking at this blog for quite some time. I have great ideas, I write notes, my phone is full of photos, I have dreams of this beautiful post with all these pictures I have taken and then by the end of the day its all fizzled out and I cannot possibly bring myself to do one more thing let alone sit at the dang computer or on the phone. I had a website dedicated to fitness with fibro and I could not maintain it. My husband was originally going to hep and that didn't work. A few friends who do website were going to help and of course that didn't work out either. When I had more time I was able to be focused and get so much done. Even with some bad days or weeks thrown in. I used to read blogs and websites and think  "wow, the last post was a year ago or 2 years ago. Where did they go? Dont they care? What about the readers?"

                                                                       
                                          BAAAAAH
Now I do!

How easy it is for that to happen and how intrinsically I understand it now.
 Now I have no time and with some bad days thrown in there it seems every day only the bare minimum gets done.
Im just surviving. I have no time to share my entire story with the world. Or half my sto...well, even 1/4 of my story.....with anyone.
But I do have some highlights and plans to fill in the blanks when I have a couple days off next week. (best laid plans.....fingers crossed).

Probably the biggest thing is we moved a few months ago into this new house. Its a shade smaller and for someone who's got ADD, OCD and Fibro, it went fairly well. I had no major stress or anxiety issues until a couple days after moving in. (Thats big because we were living out of boxes all summer leading up to the move. More on that later) We left some things at the old place and the hubster got a friend to go get it all. I went over the next day to "clean" and saw there was still a million things left including heavy furniture and so yeah...I had a flip out. I wanted, no, NEEDED to be done at the old place. 

THE OLD PLACE...sounds like a book title. It could be had I desire to write everything down. We were packed in like sardines with our neighbors (not the good kind). It was loud, stressful, we had no privacy, we had constant knocking on the door, lots of foot traffic, car traffic, noise from a bar and also the drunk people staggering down the street after it closed. We had fights we had to call the police for every other month, a half way house, a rehab center, a 7-11 and a liquor store, neighbors who blasted music from their cars at all hours.....I could go on but the kicker was the kids couldn't ride their bike down the street without our thinking they'd get run over or kidnapped. And that's not my anxiety, that's the neighborhood.  


THE NEW PLACE...We have nice neighbors who aren't too close. Our backyard is very large, more long than wide and then goes down into the woods. Its conservation land so no one will build or encroach. Its almost magically quiet with the only sounds coming from various birds. We have deer, turkeys, rabbits and other critters who come to visit. Nov one knocking on the door and the kids can ride around the neighborhood, walk down to a friends house or to the bus, and its all safe. The anxiety level is down from a constant 9 to a 1. Its an unbelievable difference in the actual quality of life. Instead of dreading every noise and waiting on the edge of my seat for the next thing to happen, I'm chillin' with my dog on my lap looking around for things to do.

Stress is a killer. I have posted about it before and I'm sure I will again. 

I started making things to sell on line ie opening an Etsy store. Cant keep up with that either! I was doing well but I got VERY, and I know fellow online sellers no matter what site you use can sympathize, I was getting very annoyed at the people purchasing things an not leaving any feedback. I know feedback is great for myself as a buyer. If I see other people happy I am encouraged to buy. If I see low stars, low purchases, even though I know it could be someone just starting out I get hesitant. It looks like I have sold very little and I feel its not worth all the effort when people take my goods and not post feedback. I have let my listings expire as of late and I feel no motivation to add pictures of the new things because...well...shipping and communication to get no feedback...again it feels pointless. Its not about the money. You want someone to say "hey good work and THANK YOU".
If I get in there and spruce it up I will provide a link soon. 
           

 

 

I have had painted wine glasses, pre-made scrapbook pages, awareness bracelets, awareness magnets and other assorted awareness items.



Im done training (been a while now). NOT forever I hope but...Macros, calories, injuries, demands, late nights on the pc and memory issues are not a good mix at all. I do not have enough energy  to fully maintain at the level I should be able to and that effects my confidence which effects how I carry myself. I still give advice, tips online and occasionally a paid workout but as for clients, I just cant. Do I feel like a failure? Some days. Other days I remember this is my life now. Adapting and changing as the fibro does good or bad, is the way it has to be. 

Started Crossfit. Loved it 10 minutes in and I was hooked. Those who know, know. Its not like anything else. Its just not. You fell strong, confident, you carry yourself differently and feel like you have a secret. Like you're in a secret club for the cool kids and you cant tell anyone because you wont be cool anymore. But you do tell everyone because its so great you want to share it. You want to recruit people, you want to share the high and be proud you opened up new doors for yourself and a friend. It was scary, I was intimidated, but I took my scared arse in there and MADE myself get through a free class....Immediately paid for the next month. Its one of the best things I ever did. You have to try it at least once. 


The only picture I have there, I never bring the phone in #nodistractions




Had surgery on my right shoulder. Had issues for a while, tried everything I could. Ice, heat, magnets, electric stimulation, massage. The doctors of course  ran me around the bases. PT, cortisone injections, ultrasound blah blah...finally I demanded an MRI. Diagnosis: torn labrum , also a little of the  bicep! WTF!! PT wasn't going to fix that. GGRRR
Lets count the number of times I was asked ..
A: "Did you do that a Crossfit?" and B: "are you a pitcher?"
It wasn't as bad as they let on when they finally got in there, "supposedly" but had to scrape the bone and the amount of pain I stayed in for as long as I did after was no joke. That was April. Its now December. Still have pt and although some things are great, some of the important things are not and I am very displeased to say the least. The physical therapist also said "by the way, did they tell you you have arthritis in that shoulder?" BALLS!!! No "they" didn't. She wanted to make me aware that even with surgery and pt I may still be in some level of pain from the arthritis so not to get my hopes sup. FUN STUFF RIGHT? Ever feel like you are surrounded by idiots? My main goal is not 100 percent, but I want to go back to crossfit. Right now I feel like I cant carry my weight. QUITE LITERALLY!!


I think that's enough catching up for now. My brains will explode. I have still been reading, researching, and experimenting. I was given a copy of a book about cfs and fibro to read before it was to hit the shelves (which it has already) so I have a review on that, some supplements and some other things. Wow, Im still amazed at how being so extremely tired  all the time can set you back a millennia.









16 comments:

  1. Very impressive blog. Loved reading it.At Dr. Park Acupuncture we not only treat the symptoms, of chronic pain, fibromyalgia, allergies, or the myriad of other diseases, but also work with you to identify and treat the root cause of the symptoms with Acupuncture and Chinese Medicine.
    Acupuncture in Ellicott City

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  5. Keep up with the crossfit! Exercise along staves off the depression and obviously keeps you strong over time.

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  6. I am Sophie from Canada, I once suffered from a terrible and Chronic fibromhyalgia,since i was bone , the doctor told me there was no permanent cure i was given medications to slow down its progress, i constantly felt my health was deteriorating as i constantly had Painful menstrual periods,this ailment was really terrible especially when am going out with my friends, i have this constant disorder for about 31 years, this was really a terrible ailment ,on thin one day that i was going through the internet,and i came across a post of Mrs jessica on how his daughter was been cured from fibromhyalgia through the help of Dr Williams herbal product, I contacted this herbal doctor via his email and explain everything to him and make purchase of his product,few days later he sent me the herbal medicine through courier service, when i received the herbal medicine, i used it for 1 months and two weeks as prescribed by dr williams and i was totally cured within those week of usage,on thin now i have not experience any sign or characteristics again . for more information you can email him on drwilliams098675@gmail.com for help

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  7. ALL THANKS TO DR WILLIAMS FOR THE GREAT DEED HE HAVE DONE FOR MY DAUGHTER?
    My daughter suffered from fibromyalgia for more than 12 years which we started experiencing in her when she turned 8 year and 5 months we all thought it will end but got even worse as days went by. We tried all several treatments and therapy prescribed by various doctors we met but to no avail, she always complain of joint stiffness, and have difficulty falling asleep. She usually tells me she feeling tired. This were steady disorder that disrupted her entire life, even at night she slept less because of this.It was during a casual conversation with a friend that i learned about Dr Williams herbal medicine I was able to contact him on his email address. and give him all the necessary information that he needed,few day later he sent me the herbal portion and his medicine was able to restore her back to normal and she is very okay now without any side effects whatsoever. If you have fibromyalgia, do not hesitate to contact him on drwilliams098675@gmail.com for advice and for his product. I hope this also helps someone out there

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  8. Thanks to Dr Williams I am so happy today, I have been suffering from Fibromyalgia for the past 8 years now, and i have spent a lot on western drugs which has all proved abortive, i have tried all means in life to become Fibromyalgia free , but there was no answer until i decided to try herbal solution and i found Dr Williams online and i contacted him and after I took his medication as instructed, i am now Fibromyalgia free within those week of usage, i am so much happy, thanks to Dr Williams for helping me get my life back again without any form of crisis, i promise to tell your name and good deeds to the whole world,if you have Fibromyalgia you can email him on drwilliams098675@gmail.com for more information .

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  9. "DR WILLIAMS, I wish to praise you for sharing such a simple but comprehensive herbal medication to tackle this pain from the root. This is truly a valuable resource for all men and woman suffering from fibromyalgia. It's been almost 10 months since my doctor first diagnosed me with fibromyalgia. My doctor suggested that I will try watchful waiting but as the months went nothing has changed.

    As soon as I decided I'm going all the way and treat my fibromyalgia, I ordered Dr Williams and the results as you already know were shocking to say the least. The result I took clearly showed my fibromyalgia had completely vanished.

    I have even encouraged my "Doubting Thomas" friend to order it and read it too. To have so much good information in one tight package is an unbelievable value. I would encourage anyone who suffers from fibromyalgia and/or any joint stiffness issue to take advantage of Dr Williams herbal medicine! you can contact him through his email on drwilliams098675@gmail.com for more information

    Sincerely...

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  10. ALL THANKS TO DR WILLIAMS FOR THE GREAT DEED HE HAVE DONE FOR MY DAUGHTER?
    My daughter suffered from fibromyalgia for more than 12 years which we started experiencing in her when she turned 8 year and 5 months we all thought it will end but got even worse as days went by. We tried all several treatments and therapy prescribed by various doctors we met but to no avail, she always complain of joint stiffness, and have difficulty falling asleep. She usually tells me she feeling tired. This were steady disorder that disrupted her entire life, even at night she slept less because of this.It was during a casual conversation with a friend that i learned about Dr Williams herbal medicine I was able to contact him on his email address. and give him all the necessary information that he needed,few day later he sent me the herbal portion and his medicine was able to restore her back to normal and she is very okay now without any side effects whatsoever. If you have fibromyalgia, do not hesitate to contact him on drwilliams098675@gmail.com for advice and for his product. I hope this also helps someone out there

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  11. Dr Williams,his medicine was extremely helpful to my daughter. I have had a daughter with fibromyalgia for 21 years now , and my doctor have prescribe me with different kinds of western drugs without no improvement in my daughter symptoms . I am so glad I have found Dr Williams medicine (as I was surfing the net for a solution and saw a recommendation for it on a women's health forum early this year). I have felt so empowered by the knowledge you have given me and I quickly self diagnosed the individual cause of my daughter fibromyalgia and armed with his clear instructions, I was finally able to beat this monster, in less than 4 weeks of using dr Williams medication on my daughter. she went for a checkup and it was clear that my daughter fibromyalgia were gone,you can also email him on drwilliams098675@gmail.com for help.

    Thank you, thank you , thank you. Dr Williams "

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  12. I am Sophie from Canada, I once suffered from a terrible and Chronic fibromhyalgia,since i was bone , the doctor told me there was no permanent cure i was given medications to slow down its progress, i constantly felt my health was deteriorating as i constantly had Painful menstrual periods,this ailment was really terrible especially when am going out with my friends, i have this constant disorder for about 31 years, this was really a terrible ailment ,on thin one day that i was going through the internet,and i came across a post of Mrs jessica on how his daughter was been cured from fibromhyalgia through the help of Dr Williams herbal product, I contacted this herbal doctor via his email and explain everything to him and make purchase of his product,few days later he sent me the herbal medicine through courier service, when i received the herbal medicine, i used it for 1 months and two weeks as prescribed by dr williams and i was totally cured within those week of usage,on thin now i have not experience any sign or characteristics again . for more information you can email him on drwilliams098675@gmail.com for help

    ReplyDelete
  13. As a sign of gratitude for how my son was saved from fibromyalgia , i decided to reach out to those still suffering from this.
    My son suffered fibromyalgia in the year 2013 and it was really tough and heartbreaking for me because he was my all and the symptoms were terrible, he always complain of joint stiffness, and he always have difficulty falling asleep . we tried various therapies prescribed by our neurologist but none could cure him. I searched for a cure and i saw a testimony by someone who was cured and so many other with similar body problem, and he left the contact of the doctor who had the cure to fibromyalgia . I never imagined fibromyalgia has a natural cure not until i contacted him and he assured me my son will be fine. I got the herbal medication he recommended and my son used it and in one months time he was fully okay even up till this moment he is so full of life. fibromyalgia has a cure and it is a herbal cure contact the doctor for more info on drwilliams098675@gmail.com on how to get the medication. Thanks for reading my story

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  14. CURE TO FIBROMYALGIA WITHOUT ANY SIDE EFFECT: My husband was diagnosed with fibromyalgia . My husbad fibromyalgia was something i don't understand he cry so bad that he was usually in bed for about 8 hours and soreness killers (even prescription strength) don't stop the weakness of the joint, even if he take triple the dosage. my husband symptoms was really so terrible,that we have to make hospital our home, and all the doctors would do is monitor it, prescribe him countless of control pills and pain medication with no positive result. until recently I contacted a Doctor who put an end to this problem. If you are having same problem with fibromyalgia contact Dr. William for advice and possible solution without any side effect (drwilliams098675@gmail.com

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  15. I am so sorry you are in so much pain from fibromyalgia. I have had many clients with this condition . I have massaged many and helped them get out of pain. Yes it takes time BUT regular massages weekly or no weekly will help ! ♥️

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  16. Just wanted to say a huge thank you to Dr Williams for everything he have done in my life. I have been in tears for so many years now, having found that my husband is suffering from fibromyalgia, lesion after some years of being under extreme stress., . I spent 24 hours freaking out and finally calmed down after reading some testimony on here about Dr Williams herbal medicine to fibromyalgia . The moment came and I mumbled out to my husband about Dr Williams product (with a few tears) and he was AMAZE – . He was just worried about his health, been free from this disorder, that was how will order for Dr Williams product on line , after my husband finish taking Dr Williams medicine for just within a period of one month. Will went to the doc together who confirmed that he was fibromyalgia free.
    Thank you again for being upfront, truthful and taking this pain away from my family for more information about his product you can email him on drwilliams098675@gmail.com i hope you can also help other terrified people in a similar situation.

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