I am in front of my light therapy box, have bergamot in the diffuser and have a roll on cbd oil on my wrists and I am trying to get motivated to do some things. Any things. When you have that list a mile long, but know you may really only get to two of them. I am trying to decide which 2 things will take priority when and if I get moving.
Also, I am looking on my sidebar at all the blogs I follow, or follow'ed' regularly and almost all of them have not posted in YEARS!! Not months, years. So I don't feel so bad dropping the ball here myself when I was so on top of things in the past.
One note to make was I was home 100% of the time, on disability. I had nothing but time to research things, read, and write. Now its been a few years where I have been working full time or working art time with side jobs. There is never enough money and I swear if I want relying on so many vitamins and supplements to function every day Id have a few more dollars in my pocket.
I have now left the preschool I was at, Covid-related (and I was totally backstabbed by a boss I've known and trusted for about 25 years, lets just put that out there since this is my honesty place).
I had 2 friends simultaneously ask about watching their kids when school started in September, and i looked at it as a blessing from God since we would have been homeless without my income to help. Where do you go to get a job during a pandemic that you actually feel safe and would bring home a decent paycheck?
So now i have kids in my house, parents aren't allowed to go past the front porch for drop off and pickup, but its still scary. My kids are remote and have been since school started., probably all year at this point. Its better I am home.
Today starts 2021.
I'm sick of sadness all together
Oh, I could use a distraction to cope with my life
So thin a little more healthy
See the sun every night
I don't have to feel good
Oh, I just wanna feel better"