Friday, January 1, 2021

2021 ALREADY? Living in a time warp

 I am in front of my light therapy box, have bergamot in the diffuser and have a roll on cbd oil on my wrists and I am trying to get motivated to do some things. Any things. When you have that list a mile long, but know you may really only get to two of them. I am trying to decide which 2 things will take priority when and if I get moving.


Also, I am looking on my sidebar at all the blogs I follow, or follow'ed' regularly and almost all of them have not posted in YEARS!! Not months, years. So I don't feel so bad dropping the ball here myself when I was so on top of things in the past.

One note to make was I was home 100% of the time, on disability. I had nothing but time to research things, read, and write. Now its been a few years where I have been working full time or working art time with side jobs. There is never enough money and I swear if I want relying on so many vitamins and supplements to function every day Id have a few more dollars in my pocket. 

I have now left the preschool I was at, Covid-related (and I was totally backstabbed by a boss I've known and trusted for about 25 years, lets just put that out there since this is my honesty place).

I had 2 friends simultaneously ask about watching their kids when school  started in September, and i looked at it as a blessing from God since we would have been homeless without my income to help. Where do you go to get a job during a pandemic that you actually feel safe and would bring home a decent paycheck? 

So now i have kids in my house, parents aren't allowed to go past the front porch for drop off and pickup, but its still scary. My kids are remote and have been since school started., probably all year at this point. Its better I am home.

Today starts 2021.



No resolutions because those aren't actually kept. Just to continue working on myself is my plan wherever that leads. I am back on meds for the winter, although I have skipped a few sessions, talking to a therapist, and the next is to get back to the chiropractor.

"I dont have feel good, I just want to feel better"~Alone Time by Lovelytheband

that sums it up. I know it does for a lot of  people.

'...And I would change it if I could, if I could
I'm sick of sadness all together
Oh, I could use a distraction to cope with my life
So thin a little more healthy
See the sun every night
I don't have to feel good
Oh, I just wanna feel better"

I heard a statistic the other day that the person in the household who goes to therapy is the higher functioning person. I already could have told you that πŸ˜† but hey...

So I just walked the dog, feel better. 

Lots of stress and concern in this house because we are black, spanish and have asthma.
Apparently Fibro isn't an added condition to be concerned about, but the stress of thinking about it is still an energy sucker.
 Beyond that, stress itself can have a toll on the immune system and that's what they are listing as making you more susceptible to covid!  A compromised immune system. I say that it does not mean you have a have diagnosed autoimmune system disease, I believe it only needs to be just weakened or compromised. CHRONIC PAIN DOES THAT! STRESS DOES THAT!
Had to look up some things, thought I'd share.






So the key here is as usual, as many post, study, research, and publish about, is to find ways to be less stressed. NOW more than ever for those of us with chronic pain conditions. PERIOD.







Monday, April 13, 2020

Stay at Home? (You don't have to tell me twice!)


Stay at home advisory. Still working for me!!

Today is 28 days since we were told to stay home because school was closed in neighboring towns (the first time). We were originally supposed to stay be closed for 2 weeks until March 27th. Then it was extended to April 7th.
 I wont lie the first few days I was so stressed  about work and money it triggered anxiety (more than usual), insomnia, an over consumption of coffee and a lot of depressing thoughts. Mostly because I knew the insurance if approved would be about 3 days pay compared to working a full week. Then March 25th Mass had a  stay at home advisory and schools closed at least until May 5th. Wait what?!

I tried to think positively but it wasn't easy. When I'm at work I want to be home. I think of all the things I could be doing, painting, cleaning, or just laying on the couch letting my body hurt and rest.
SO, mentally I had to recenter myself. It didn't work, but I felt better at least trying to be calm than feeding the stress. Stress is a killer. ( Haven't said that before πŸ‘€).


A press conference almost every day, one from The Governor an one from the mayor, then the President started.  The news at 4 o'clock, 5 o'clock, and 6 o'clock with the daily updates on positive test numbers, how many deaths, and social media is mostly people in fear spreading more news about the virus an things they heard to prevent it, treat it, avoid it....SO I switched to decaf, started some online CBT and stopped looking and listening to all that.
Then the approval came from unemployment and although it was not a lot it was better than nothing and I was lucky to have it. Some people were getting nothing. But then I started looking for a job because its just not enough. That's reality. No matter how lucky I am to have it, it does not pay much more than a weeks worth of groceries.

Lots of back and forth with places, also thought of going to offer services if they needed teachers at one of the approved daycare centers allowed to stay open for first responders children. Then didn't want to put myself in harms way deliberately.
Ended up having interview with Amazon, on line then in person. Then the news started telling us how Amazon/Instacart workers are afraid (who isn't!) because they don't have proper ppe. Instacart workers were getting offered big tips to complete orders and then after the deliveries the costumer was changing the tip amount to very low.
WHY are costumers allowed to change the tip amount for up to 3 days after a delivery anyway?! That system seems set up to fail and completely one sided, but  I digress....

Then the more I looked at the training video for amazon the less I wanted to work there. Seems there is no way not to touch everything and stay safely distanced from people, even with masks and gloves, does not seem safe when the alternative is to stay home.
Then the approval of the stimulus package that included an increase in the amount of unemployment so problem solved. Im staying home!


I decided if the mayor had a press conference Id listen to that, and the one 1/2 hour at night with David Muir would be my only dose of news for a little while.

That brings me to today. I finally felt like actually posting more than just some projects.

 I am able to be focused and finish tasks everyday said NO ONE with chronic pain EVER!

Today I finished painting on glass, a mandala that I printed from the Cricut Design space, and that's about all I did. The weather is rain and wind, the lights flickered, oh and I managed writing this. That's not lasting long.



 I'm not sure if I am putting back in the picture frame I took the glass out of or making some other thingymagig to be able to hang it up as a stained glass. Either way its done. I wanted to paint on glass and it was the only available glass. I started 4 days ago then took a break for the masks.

Well more later. Now that I am home and have time, I can update. I think I said that last February. Yikes SMH






Wednesday, April 1, 2020

Did I have Covid-19 (The Coronavirus)?

Friday March 6 
  That was a normal day.
That night I was exhausted. Beyond regular exhausted or fibro exhausted.
Everything hurt so bad I couldn't move at all once I laid in the bed. I had to grab my phone and text one of my kids to come get the dog to go out.  I barely moved or rolled over at all the entire night. I just lay there in agony. Muscle aches and extreme fatigue prevented me from even getting up for the bathroom which I usually do twice a night.

Saturday March 7                           

  I have no recollection of that day (or night) at all. Yeah I  think that's a bit strange.
Side note: I couldn't remember Saturday by the next Monday!

Sunday March 8 
  That was a normal day other than the fact I wasn't hungry at all until about 3 in the afternoon and only ate something because I felt nauseous. That night again I was in bed early before my kids I was so fatigued. I could not move my body at all. I tried to get up to let the dog out and I was so dizzy I started to fall over. I grabbed the wall, steadied myself then got back in bed. I texed my other daughter this time to come get the dog. Hhmm, no flags yet since all these things have happened before.


Monday March 9
  I woke up very nauseous and dizzy, but when I mentioned it at breakfast to my kids, my youngest said "You always feel sick in the morning". Well, shes kinda right. I always feel sick, and unhappy, and a little terrified wondering if I can even fake it and make it through another week of work. I thought about calling in sick but I wasn't really sick was I?  For me to miss work, even one hour less in a much needed paycheck, I have to be under a bus LITERALLY, so I didn't do that. But, I can suck it up, because that's what I do. My breakfast tasted totally disgusting. I specifically had a conversation with  myself about how many of these breakfast sandwiches I just purchased and what a waste it was if I was already getting sick of them.

When I got to work I let my coworkers know I didn't feel good but I wasn't going to say anything because I did not want to get sent home and lose hours, and to keep their distance.

Side note: We had the stomach bug going through the building bigtime, teachers and kids were dropping like flies for about 2 weeks. My boss was sending people home every day in between people calling out. I was NOT going to be one.

At this time it was the beginning of the freak out about the Coronavirus. We had confirmations in Boston, Natick and Wellesley and Lincoln. Near us in Wayland relatively speaking, but nothing to make us really worry about yet. The only things we discussed were if school shut down would we keep working or stay home with our kids. But if the governor issued a stay at home order we all said we would not be going to work even if we were open. (Sorry boss.)

While the kids (at work) slept I had muscle aches and pain like there I ran a marathon in bad weather AND got run over by a 18 Wheeler. After I filled out parent notes I could not get up off the floor. I had the floater cover me to go in the office and get Advil assuming it was my fibro and or arthritis trying to kill me.

By the time I left at 5 o'clock I was burning up. I had to flap my sweater open and closed to avoid to passing out while I stood there making some copies. One of the bosses actually asked me if I was having hot flashes. I said YES, to which she replied "The heat is on pretty high in here"
Went home and basically sat on the couch all night. Then moved to the bed. Tired, hot, then cold, then passed out.

Tuesday March 10
  Woke up actually sick. Full out nausea.  My insides were shaking like when you have those butterflies before vomiting. I could barely stand up straight. I was breathing heavy ( I say panting like a dog) to catch my breath. I thought about going to work anyway for a second, then laughed at myself at how ridiculous that was. No way was I infecting anyone else AND I wasn't going to make it. Lets be real. I took a bucket with me to drive the kids to the bus stop in case I threw up. I called out of work then went home. Stayed on the couch, bathroom with diarrhea, freezing cold, chills, still on the couch, bathroom, then to bed where I would NOT leave again for almost 48 hours.

I stayed in bed all day except 2 more trips to the bathroom. I felt like I was in a dream, or coma. Thing were fuzzy and I couldn't  tell if it was day or night, or how much time passed, minutes or hours.  I only moved to kick the blanket off when I was too hot, and to put it back on when I was freezing. I was waking up because of sleep apnea all day. 

That was the scariest part.I mean THE SCARIEST thing of all. To stop breathing while your sleeping and wake up gasping for air!!! I mean OH MY GAWD! If you've never been through it, you think you will die. You'll just not wake up one of these times and that's it, its over for good. I thought about going to the doctors, couldn't even move for the phone, and I knew I couldn't even get in the car to go. I thought at one point I was going to die for real, I just couldn't breath. I had to  and lay on my stomach to be able to breath at all. I thought I was not long for an ambulance but then I thought about the $500 emergency visit copay and decided no. Ill just die here in the bed. My family knows I want to donate organs. 

My husband had the day off and says he was checking on me but I don't really remember. I remember he was going to pick up or drop off a child and I said migraine meds and saltines. Took them with a few crackers after he was home and kept feeling the same. I still no idea what time it was. Heard some people talking downstairs in between waking up then it was dark, I was still sleeping. I have no idea if I had any conversations with anyone. I took the migraine pills again later but 2 times as much as I was supposed to and it eventually did make a slight dent in the head pain. The night was a blur other than gasping for air, wheezing and managing to get to the bathroom once. 

I had a migraine, stiff muscles and muscle aches, the sleep apnea, fever, chills, dizziness, dry cough, tight chest and a fear of death. 

Wednesday March 11
  Woke up slightly better but called the doctors anyway. Stayed in bed until it was time to go. Work said to stay home the rest of the week because what I had sounded worse what everyone else had and they were all set anyway. Denied!! I was a little irritated about it because again, I need the money. At the doctors they made me wear a mask which has been standard procedure if you have a cough for a long time now anyway, but if it wasn't they would have  made me wear one because of  Covid. I gave them all my symptoms, they asked if I have been in contact with anyone who's tested positive or shown symptoms. NOPE.

 They diagnosed me with a gastrointestinal virus (stomach bug/flu). I was severely dehydrated and she said that explained the muscle aches, fatigue, dizziness, all over body pain and probably what triggered the migraine. The stomach bug explained the tender belly and diarrhea, nausea and awful stomach noises, and dehydration.
She failed to explain everything else but at that point I didn't care. All I was focused on was getting a note so I could go back to work on Thursday and Friday but she said no. She gave me 24 hours to re-hydrate myself  or else she was going to send me to the er for iv fluids. She said she would write a note on Monday to go back to work on Tuesday if I was better, but not the rest of the week. Denied again!

Thursday March 12th and Friday the 13th slowly on the mend, very little activity. Sitting, resting, only eating soup and crackers. the cough was slowly going away. The dizziness was slowly going away. I was partly thankful I didn't go back to work because other than the fibro flares I used to have that laid me out, I haven't had a rest in a while. A real sit around and do nothing rest. 

I had whooping cough in November and that took me 6 weeks to stop the horrible coughing and I was still at work everyday. Same doctor, and she only said I had to stay out of work 1 day that time.
Late Wednesday work called and said I couldn't go back without a FLU test. OMG what a pain!


Add caption


Called the office. I was told my symptoms were not flu like related, I had already been diagnosed with the stomach bug, and they wouldn't give me one. I asked for a call back from the manager/head doctor. He in turn said the same thing, but in addition,  he said they are not doing any mouth or nose swabs at this time because they have no way to protect the staff. I could go to the emergency room if I felt like it but that they wouldn't test me for the flu either because I had no symptoms. Again, not paying the emergency room deductible. 

I told work on Thursday they would give me a flu test, she responded  with "go to the minute clinic". PPFFTT  πŸ˜‘

Friday the 13th I went to The Minute clinic, waited 2 1/2 hours  even though I had an appointment, with actual sick people everywhere, any of which could have actually had the coronvirus, for the flu test. NEGATIVE for A or B. So yeah I can go back to work.

This all makes me wonder (after the fact) if this time, because of covid the doctor didn't want me to  go back to work? Either because they had no tests, I didn't fit the criteria of being in contact with a positive person to get tested (even tough symptoms fit), or she thought I had it and didn't want to tell me, freak me out AND couldn't test me. Who knows, but I wonder why with something that IS contagious she let me go back to work in the middle of flu season, and with the stomach bug she had me out for almost a week in spring?? At this time they are saying a lot of people who test positive for coronavirus also test positive for the flu, and it was taking 2 weeks for most people to get better so I had not really myself contemplated the idea that I would have it. Plus I wasn't near any one that I know of. 

*Update: 4/19/20 We do now know the criteria for getting tested changed a couple times, the availability of testing was always an issue until just recently, and there are many people who had it but never got tested because there wasn't a test available. Also some were told to stay home because there was nothing to do and only come in if it got worse and it became severe enough. Some people had it with such mild symptoms they never went to the doctor or assumed it was a cold or allergies and did nothing about it.

Also Friday March 13th
  Work had so many children out they were getting a count of who wanted to work the next week and who didn't so they could staff appropriately. I said work. I was just out a week I mean really! 

By Sunday March 15th schools closed for 2 weeks, so we were closing on the 16th because of coronavirus, until March 27th. "Stay safe, stay healthy"  Apply for unemployment. WHAT?! Who's paying my bills?

Holy crap! I will be homeless and cant pay rent for sure now. Talk about STRESS!

March 24th we were issued the "stay at home advisory" until April 7th.

March 25th schools were closed until May 4th

March 29th Stay at home advisory until April 30

March 31st Stay at home advisory extended to May 4th

Now is when I think I may have to go back on meds that I have previously gotten off of. 

In between here I decided to start some "coronacrafts". I saw that term somewhere else among others but that was the one i liked best and seemed less to offend anyone. Make the most of being home with my babies while I can, if I didn't have to find a job.


Fun Things to do While Social Distancing 










Wednesday, March 25, 2020

Stay at Home Day 10

Day 10

I used My Cricut to cut out a heart shape and put the heart on one canvas and the cut out on another canvas to mirror each other. 


I used the Cricut to cut thin strips so I could  divide them into sections. I used painting tape on a similar project and because of the texture of the canvas it bleeds slightly through so I decided to stick with the vinyl. (Excuse my foot HA HA)
Then painted each section a different color. I made sure to use only the exactly same colors on both of them.




I peeled off the vinyl.


Basic and easy but cute. I went with colors that would be bright since things have such a somber overtone lately. 
#Keeping Busy
#coronacrafts











Tuesday, March 24, 2020

Stay at Home Advisory Day 9

Day 9

Im setting small goals daily. You have to. I went a little crazy the first couple days home and realized I cant run like that. I will be burnt out, in pain and the mental energy thats required to sustain that kind of focus is not attainable, not long term anyway.
Case in point, right now, my body hurts, sat in front of email and Pinterest for a couple hours just vegging out. 
I finally decided to try the wood burner my kids got me for Christmas. I looked on line and decided on a deer silhouette I found on Design Space. I cut one out of vinyl, stuck it to the wood and traced the outline.

                         

                   


 original post on Insta



It came out ok. Im a pretty good artist but by definitely not a professional at wood burning. It is fun, and I have practice boards so I will get better with time and practice. 

Saturday, March 21, 2020

Stay at Home Advisory Day 5 & 6

Day 5 and 6


I spent 8 1/2 hours over Friday night and tonight putting this crazy piece puzzle together with my  kids. Spend the day mostly cleaning and disinfecting. Talk about a back ache, but I love hanging out with my kids.

 I have to make the most of being home. I spend so much time I'm pain and at work when these moments pop up you gotta grab them!!

Saturday, December 17, 2016

When you procrastinate...for a year!

Well we all know procrastination and lack of energy go hand in hand. Lack of energy and fibromyalgia also go hand in hand. So it should come as no surprise that I have put off even looking at this blog for quite some time. I have great ideas, I write notes, my phone is full of photos, I have dreams of this beautiful post with all these pictures I have taken and then by the end of the day its all fizzled out and I cannot possibly bring myself to do one more thing let alone sit at the dang computer or on the phone. I had a website dedicated to fitness with fibro and I could not maintain it. My husband was originally going to hep and that didn't work. A few friends who do website were going to help and of course that didn't work out either. When I had more time I was able to be focused and get so much done. Even with some bad days or weeks thrown in. I used to read blogs and websites and think  "wow, the last post was a year ago or 2 years ago. Where did they go? Dont they care? What about the readers?"

                                                                       
                                          BAAAAAH
Now I do!

How easy it is for that to happen and how intrinsically I understand it now.
 Now I have no time and with some bad days thrown in there it seems every day only the bare minimum gets done.
Im just surviving. I have no time to share my entire story with the world. Or half my sto...well, even 1/4 of my story.....with anyone.
But I do have some highlights and plans to fill in the blanks when I have a couple days off next week. (best laid plans.....fingers crossed).

Probably the biggest thing is we moved a few months ago into this new house. Its a shade smaller and for someone who's got ADD, OCD and Fibro, it went fairly well. I had no major stress or anxiety issues until a couple days after moving in. (Thats big because we were living out of boxes all summer leading up to the move. More on that later) We left some things at the old place and the hubster got a friend to go get it all. I went over the next day to "clean" and saw there was still a million things left including heavy furniture and so yeah...I had a flip out. I wanted, no, NEEDED to be done at the old place. 

THE OLD PLACE...sounds like a book title. It could be had I desire to write everything down. We were packed in like sardines with our neighbors (not the good kind). It was loud, stressful, we had no privacy, we had constant knocking on the door, lots of foot traffic, car traffic, noise from a bar and also the drunk people staggering down the street after it closed. We had fights we had to call the police for every other month, a half way house, a rehab center, a 7-11 and a liquor store, neighbors who blasted music from their cars at all hours.....I could go on but the kicker was the kids couldn't ride their bike down the street without our thinking they'd get run over or kidnapped. And that's not my anxiety, that's the neighborhood.  


THE NEW PLACE...We have nice neighbors who aren't too close. Our backyard is very large, more long than wide and then goes down into the woods. Its conservation land so no one will build or encroach. Its almost magically quiet with the only sounds coming from various birds. We have deer, turkeys, rabbits and other critters who come to visit. Nov one knocking on the door and the kids can ride around the neighborhood, walk down to a friends house or to the bus, and its all safe. The anxiety level is down from a constant 9 to a 1. Its an unbelievable difference in the actual quality of life. Instead of dreading every noise and waiting on the edge of my seat for the next thing to happen, I'm chillin' with my dog on my lap looking around for things to do.

Stress is a killer. I have posted about it before and I'm sure I will again. 

I started making things to sell on line ie opening an Etsy store. Cant keep up with that either! I was doing well but I got VERY, and I know fellow online sellers no matter what site you use can sympathize, I was getting very annoyed at the people purchasing things an not leaving any feedback. I know feedback is great for myself as a buyer. If I see other people happy I am encouraged to buy. If I see low stars, low purchases, even though I know it could be someone just starting out I get hesitant. It looks like I have sold very little and I feel its not worth all the effort when people take my goods and not post feedback. I have let my listings expire as of late and I feel no motivation to add pictures of the new things because...well...shipping and communication to get no feedback...again it feels pointless. Its not about the money. You want someone to say "hey good work and THANK YOU".
If I get in there and spruce it up I will provide a link soon. 
           

 

 

I have had painted wine glasses, pre-made scrapbook pages, awareness bracelets, awareness magnets and other assorted awareness items.



Im done training (been a while now). NOT forever I hope but...Macros, calories, injuries, demands, late nights on the pc and memory issues are not a good mix at all. I do not have enough energy  to fully maintain at the level I should be able to and that effects my confidence which effects how I carry myself. I still give advice, tips online and occasionally a paid workout but as for clients, I just cant. Do I feel like a failure? Some days. Other days I remember this is my life now. Adapting and changing as the fibro does good or bad, is the way it has to be. 

Started Crossfit. Loved it 10 minutes in and I was hooked. Those who know, know. Its not like anything else. Its just not. You fell strong, confident, you carry yourself differently and feel like you have a secret. Like you're in a secret club for the cool kids and you cant tell anyone because you wont be cool anymore. But you do tell everyone because its so great you want to share it. You want to recruit people, you want to share the high and be proud you opened up new doors for yourself and a friend. It was scary, I was intimidated, but I took my scared arse in there and MADE myself get through a free class....Immediately paid for the next month. Its one of the best things I ever did. You have to try it at least once. 


The only picture I have there, I never bring the phone in #nodistractions




Had surgery on my right shoulder. Had issues for a while, tried everything I could. Ice, heat, magnets, electric stimulation, massage. The doctors of course  ran me around the bases. PT, cortisone injections, ultrasound blah blah...finally I demanded an MRI. Diagnosis: torn labrum , also a little of the  bicep! WTF!! PT wasn't going to fix that. GGRRR
Lets count the number of times I was asked ..
A: "Did you do that a Crossfit?" and B: "are you a pitcher?"
It wasn't as bad as they let on when they finally got in there, "supposedly" but had to scrape the bone and the amount of pain I stayed in for as long as I did after was no joke. That was April. Its now December. Still have pt and although some things are great, some of the important things are not and I am very displeased to say the least. The physical therapist also said "by the way, did they tell you you have arthritis in that shoulder?" BALLS!!! No "they" didn't. She wanted to make me aware that even with surgery and pt I may still be in some level of pain from the arthritis so not to get my hopes sup. FUN STUFF RIGHT? Ever feel like you are surrounded by idiots? My main goal is not 100 percent, but I want to go back to crossfit. Right now I feel like I cant carry my weight. QUITE LITERALLY!!


I think that's enough catching up for now. My brains will explode. I have still been reading, researching, and experimenting. I was given a copy of a book about cfs and fibro to read before it was to hit the shelves (which it has already) so I have a review on that, some supplements and some other things. Wow, Im still amazed at how being so extremely tired  all the time can set you back a millennia.









Tuesday, November 15, 2016

Kratom For Pain (and other things)



What is Kratom?

It is a Southeast Asian native tree(Mitragyna speciosa). *Oddly enough it is in the same family as coffee. sIt's a natural analgesic which has been used for hundreds of years to safely alleviate pain, combat fatigue and help with the effects of anxiety and depression.
The leaves of the tree have been used in  low doses (as a stimulant) or high doses (as a sedative). It has been used to treat pain, diarrhea, arthritis, fibromyalgia, treatment for opiate addiction and much more.

How can you take it
You can remove the central vein and chew on it (not recommended). This is mainly done in its native region. Dried leaves can be powdered or crushed to make it easier to swallow. 

The powder can be mixed with water or other liquids. It is quite bitter so fair warning. One site recommends making a chocolate  milkshake to get it down the in the best tasting way possible.

 You can mix it (powder) with applesauce, ice cream or yogurt .

You can have it put into capsules. 

Small drops of the extract can be dissolved in hot water as tea, or mix the tea with the regular tea you drink. 
extract


When mixing coffee with it you can use milk, cream, sugar or honey to manage the bitter taste. 

There are different strains for different effects. It has been banned in some states and in jeopardy in others. You can check the internet for a list, there is quite a bit of info anywhere you look. Make sure you fact check! 

Malaysian strains, especially green malaysian varieties, tend to be effective for  pain relief and can be less sedating than Indo, Borneo and Bali strains. Because of this, these strains can be great for anyone who would not like to experience a drop in their energy levels. If you do not want to experiment  or do a lot of research thats involved in trying different strains for reasons of time, confusion or cost,  red vein kratom tends to be overall better for pain relief than other strains.


"In an online survey of 6,150 kratom consumers by Pain News Network and the American Kratom Association, nine out of ten said the herb was a “very effective” treatment for pain, depression, anxiety, insomnia, opioid addiction and alcoholism."

Percentage who rated Kratom effecive for pain relief.
  • 100% Cancer
  •   97% Multiple Sclerosis
  •   94% Irritable Bowel Syndrome
  •   93% Migraine
  •   93% Fibromyalgia
  •   92% Rheumatoid Arthritis
  •   92% Back pain
  •   92% Acute Pain
  •   91% Lupus and other autoimmune diseases
  •   90% Osteoarthritis
  •   90% Neuropathy
  •   88% Trigeminal Neuralgia
  •   79% RSD or CRPS
  •   76% Ehlers Danlos syndrome  


So what does this mean for us that suffer chronic pain? Well more reading, homework and guesstimating. There are many "natural" drug free remedies out there. You only need to look on face book, twitter, blogs and support groups. just do a google search and behold the plethora of options!!


 There are products, pills, plans, books, vitamins, shakes, diet plans....This is another in a long list of things you may say why not try.  Why not. Its less than other things, its a plant. But remember, PLEASE ALWAYS consult your doctor as there are always risks of side effects or interactions. 

I would love to hear from anyone who uses this in any capacity to leave a comment on how you found about it and if you think it works. I see a lot of placed dedicate to information and it seems it has a big following. It would be great if someone shared some first hand info! Thanks!


Reddit User: Tea Recipe
Reddit User: Depression

5 Simple Kratom Recipes You’ll Love




Resources not linked aboved: Dosage conversion chart, Best strains for pain relief, 






Monday, June 8, 2015

"But Exercise Makes Me Feel Worse"

"Exercise improves your pain threshold,” says Trent Nessler, PT, DPT, MPT, a vice president with Champion Sports Medicine in Birmingham, Ala. “With chronic pain, your pain threshold drops -- in other words, it takes less pain to make you feel more uncomfortable. With cardiovascular, strengthening, and flexibility exercise, you can improve that pain threshold.”

“Exercise improves your pain threshold”  

Lets think about that for a minute. 

Ok minutes up!
Who wouldnt want to feel just a bit better if they could just from getting a little exercise? 

The first thing you think is "when I exercise I feel worse". 
The next thing you think is "I am so sick of people telling me to exercise!"
(Its ok, I dont get offended)
But you have to realize the only reason people say it all the time is because generally its true. NOT always, but generally.  (I'm not talking about those who think exercise and a good nights sleep will cure you!) Just as changing your diet "generally" helps. I always point out that I am never ever a one size fits all person. I don't like blanket statements because I am smart, experienced and open enough to know that not everything works the same for everyone. 
There is such a thing as exercise intolerance. 

Impaired oxidative phosphorylation not only causes muscle fatigue but also muscle cramping with or without tenderness, or a feeling of extreme heaviness in the muscles. These symptoms are especially severe in those muscle groups being used, and patients often complain of discomfort in the legs or even muscle spasms.The discomfort may be felt immediately following the activity or later on, waking up the patient from sleep. Following more prolonged or intensive activity, the pain or heaviness can persist into the next day(s) despite rest. A subset of patients has pain associated with elevations of CK and intensive exercise can lead to frank myoglobinuria; there may also be associated lactic acidemia (DiMauro, 1999).


With that said of course if you are going to hurt more you are not going to want to do it. And it takes a special determination to do it anyway knowing what lies ahead. One of the most common statements you hear from a Fibromyalgia/ME/CFS patient is  "I'll pay for it later"
Its part of our permanent vocabulary. But lets put this in perspective.


You drink foul tasting cough medicine because you know it will help your coughing. 
You take antibiotics when you dont like prescriptions because it will help your infection.
You spend $500 dollars on a brake job because you know it will save your life. 
You do so many things as a parent that "hurt", because you are trying to shape, protect and teach your child.
Something we are very guilty of is doing too much because we dont like to say "no" to others. We KNOW its going to hurt, but we do it anyway. We just decide to "pay for it later".

Well, a permanent part of my vocabulary is "you are in pain anyway". You are in pain anyway so why no make it count for something. Why not endure just a little more pain now, to prevent even greater pain down the road? I don't say that off the cuff, I don't think "if I can do it you can do it" and  I don't think its easy. 
BUT..aside from the abundance of articles, studies and "opinions", you do experience this yourself that....
The less you move, the more it hurts. The more it hurts the less you move.
 So it becomes a self fulfilling prophecy. It hurts so bad you stop for a while and when you try again you want to die because it nearly kills you. And that's real pain, not an excuse to avoid exercise. 
The first "exercise' you should do is with your fingers! Do some research. Look on the internet, ask questions in support groups, read blogs and see what types of exercises and modalities seems to have the best results.  Make a list and then rate them in order of effectiveness. 
#1 Would be the most common, popular or least painful to incorporate. #2 Would be the next most common answer. 
Example:
1. stretching
2. walking
3.yoga 
(certain types, not the twist in a pretzel type!) 
etc....
Then, call the doctor and make an appointment to discuss the best way to go about getting some exercise. Bring your list and your research. DON'T FEEL FOOLISH. Most times coming armed with information will make them take serious, and provide specific answers. Don't let them tell you "go get a trainer", or "just start walking". That's not a plan. 
A plan is a detailed proposal for doing or achieving something, OR an intention or decision about what one is going to do. You need to decide what to try first, at what intensity level and how often. It might be to even get a referral to a physical therapist or exercise physiologist to get the proper advice and program.

For example, If you decide to walk you shouldn't just walk 2 miles after having done little to no exercise. You could cause a flare and/other reactions. Graduated walking is best.  Decide with the doctor based on your condition how much and how far. Starting with only 10 minutes (any pace) 3 times week for 3 weeks. Then try to increase it to 15 minutes or just try walking a little faster.Then 4 times a week for 3 weeks (or simply increase to 15 minutes still 3 times a week), and so on. If it does not agree with you you will know right away. Maybe you have to cut back to 2 days, walk slower, or move on to the next thing on your list.  

If you chose yoga, start with only one class in a week. Wait and see how your body responds for the next few days. (Try looking on Meetup , facebook,  or local papers, gyms and studios for a free class in your area before you commit to the cost of a full session in case its not for you. A lot of studios also offer a drop in rate to you can try just one class) Its also not a bad idea to talk to the instructor ahead of time via phone or email and make them aware of your medical issues and what your goal is. They will be able to give extra instructions for your benefit, provide blocks or straps for you to modify some of the common moves so they do not cause you great discomfort and make sure you are in the right class, or tell you which one to try.  In my experience, Hatha, Svaroopa and Restorative are the top most effective types for Fibromyalgia and whole body pain related issues. Especially for beginners. 

The key is to find something that works for you. Don't judge  yourself or compare yourself to the others, especially "healthy" people around you. Each person has their own challenges, progresses at their own level and are motivated by different reasons. I beg of you to keep trying. Just keep trying and don't get discouraged by setbacks. 
I actually took that word out of my Rolodex because it has too much of a negative connotation. It's not a setback, its simply a communication from your body. Just as a dog has to bark or a baby has to cry to communicate, your body has no voice. It has to tell you when you have pushed it too hard somehow doesn't it? Its just a message to "slow down', pace yourself and in some cases when you seem to get no feedback, its actually saying "hey that wasn't so bad! you can probably do that again!"
    • tention or decision about what one is going to do.


Matthew Jones, researcher at the University of New South Wales who led this study   said “the results remind us that the longer we stick with an exercise program, the less physically discomfiting it will feel, even if we increase our efforts ... The brain begins to accept that we are tougher than it had thought, and it allows us to continue longer, although the pain itself has not lessened.” (A less technical article that translates the study can be found here.)

*This is not to say you will be healed, that you won't or don't need additional therapies or medications. Exercise it is just an additional tool for your arsenal to help combat pain. Always consult your doctor before starting any exercise program. 
A Beginners Guide to 8 Major Types of Yoga
Yoga Diciplines- Different types of Yoga
Relieving Pain Through Exercise-Not Medicaion